First Time for Everything

Today I went to the mom's group that meets at the church we go to.

My husband had been trying to get me to go to this group for the past two years, and I finally got the courage to go. I am a shy person, if you believe it, so to go to a new place and meet new people is very hard for me. I become an observer and I often think to myself "will they like me?" It's silly, I know, but it's just how I have always been.

This group of ladies are really nice. I knew most of the mother's in passing whenever we attend Sunday morning mass, so I knew the faces, but never knew their names. A couple of the mom's I knew from preschool as well. Their daughter's attend the same class as my eldest, so it wasn't too bad of an introduction.

I wanted to go to this group at the beginning of the year, and had made it my "resolution" so to speak. After talking with a couple of the mom's from preschool that go to the group, I felt a little more at ease.

The group is very relaxed. We are studying the 10 Habits of a Happy Mother, but it's nothing like you would think, when you hear the word "studying" in a group. The habit that was read today was number 7 (yes, number 7!) and some of the passages that one of the mother's read, really helped me out.

I have a struggle with my anger, especially with my eldest being so strong headed as I am. I just yell at her when she does not do things I want her to do and that is something that has been a struggle since she could talk. It gave a couple of tips on how to help your child if they become out of control and I hope it may help you as well.

In the passage from the book, there was a mother, whose 7 year old just screamed his head off when his mother told him to pick up his toys. (As a side note, the boy was adopted so they were not sure if his outburst was caused by a memory). Instead of the mother yelling at him or wondering why in the world my child has gone beserk! She grabbed him, sat down with him in her lap, and just hugged him against her until he was calm. One of the mother's in the group told a story about her husband, who is a teacher for  special ed children, having to calm one of his children down since he was off his meds. He was bouncing every which way and just wouldn't sit still for anybody. Her husband just held the little boy against his side and after a while, finally relaxed. The mother told us that sometimes children need like some sort of pressure against them that has a calming affect on them. She couldn't remember the technical term for it, but that was the best way she could describe it.

As your day leads on and you notice your child (or children) throw a tantrum out of the norm, try giving them a hug before the emotions take head. This, I will try my hardest to do and try to stick to it.